Yesterday, I posted what I felt, and then went on to kalk bay, and that was when the low started. When I had left earlier, I had seen the scary-mobile parked by the doorway of the gallery/offices, and a little behind was the almera. Across the street was the slk. Usual suspects. When I came back, I was lamenting the fact that any change seemed to be so slow, I would probably grow a full beard before i even left this accursed place.
I knew, from the outlook, I was not going to get my low temperatures, my rain and thunder and lightning, and my earthquakes just like that, so, I vegetated. I could not, for example, tell God what I thought of Him right there in public, so, to push time, I went and sat with brian at the harbour, while looking with loathing at the mountain. I had been to see sydney, who had advised me that, because of my unsavoury past with the people who ran things, I should walk about a bit, and like a fool, I followed his advice.He was worried that my presence might draw attention to the fact that he sells ganja, like no one KNOWS that he does that!
When I had been to see him, i could have sworn the slk was NOT there, and I was certain the almera wasnt either because its one of those cars whose owners really make a person's day go from bad to worse just on sight.Anyway, time i came back from the harbour house, and was thinking of going on up the mountain, again (another day!) I did not check to see who or what was there. I had made myself plain as day, I HATE everyone of you, I want you dead, and I am not going to think twice about it. Fact, I want you all to SUFFER which is something else entirely, and in nothing i have written since i came back has there been any indication that I actually want to talk things through with anyone, or that I give a fuck what anyone thinks of what I plan. Get lost, is my motto. Keep your opinons to yourselves, because you are all just irritants, that is what I think.
Anyway, I came and sat with the zim sister who works for sydney, and we were talking, while i hoped sydney would come back and i would get money for supper- the LAST handout, thank you very much! From now on, I would rather starve. I REFUSE to perpetuate my stay in this place; fuck it, i want these fools DEAD so I can leave- and I was a bit taken aback to see the cunt of a rasta walk by, and then, a while later, goatface drive past down the one way, into the main road, right past me. It was not hard to guess what had happened, so i got up, to throw away a banana peel, and yep, the slk WAS back, and so she was probably up there, and every silly little fool was probably thinking, again, that somehow I do not intend to live up to my words and kill everyone and the silly bitch as well, and so, they were moving about trying to maybe show me that I had to be reasonable.
Reasonable my ass! I am GOING to FRY your asses, ALL of you. I WROTE it, and by God I am going to DO it, and I do not change my mind, especially where you stupid presumptuous fools who think you have brain cells between your ears when in effect, if it came to a contest, you would be left standing like a person on a bike trying to take on a stunt pilot in a jet in a race. There is NO contest between me and you. You are outclassed, out of your league, and I am going to REMOVE you from my sight
And they carry on, relentlessly pissing me off like I am the one who has to back down while they live their lives of comfort.
It is going to be a pleasure to make an end to you, fools.
Anyway, sydney came, and we made our deals, and then, I was going to buy the only food that seems to go down nowadays, lentils, and the almear was there, by the main road, just outside the olympia cafe entrance where this crippled guy with is green CR-V usually parks it, the same guy who, with some blonde used to hound me as I walked around fish hoek. What THEIR problem was, I had NO idea.
I just ... hoped... yesterday, that when I came back the almear would be gone, because that woman, the dumbbak toad, well, she really nauseates me. I actually forgot about her, because i was looking at the office window, and I got MAD, and decided that I would show the cunt that she had so pissed me off i was going to kill her. Fuck the fact that she has family or whatever, they will die, that is NO skin off my back. I am NOT going to spare a SINGLE person that has angered me, and here i will do a bit of , fuck it, I am not interested in someone that shows a marked interest in a plethora of men. Let her die with them. besides, I do not trust the woman, and I do not want to be forever wondering if i matter, so to hell with this, she dies. i will live alone.
The toad WAS waiting. she waited for me to walk up to her, before pulling out, making a U-turn and then joining the fish hoek bound traffic, and i stopped, looked at her, and wonderd if she HAD a brain. I mean, you tell some you HATE the person, what kind of concord does the person think she and you can have?
Silly bitch!
And God delays my ... emancipation. The Asshole. I am going to sleep!
