Been trying to find my ... feet... in this weird world I find myself in, with a Friend I hate, and everything upside down.
Guess there are somew omen who think this is all, or should be, or will be (once i get my head straight and stop thinking with my dick, or something), about THEM, but that is not the case.unfortunately, I find myself having only ONE focus in life, and that, weirdly enough, is the source of my exuberant bellicosity, as well as my libido.
I HATE.
period.
God, and His uninvited inclusion into my life, and His advice, have stirred up the muddy waters for a while, and as a resuly, I have had to ... think... to find out what it is I want in life, or out of it, in every sense of the word, and I have discovered that I would hate very much to be God's puppet. THAT is my main concern, but if He steps aside and lets me do my shit, then I have only one aim in mind, revenge, and war, and will use whatever I have to to achieve that end.
At this point God, however, seems to want a piece, because i would be content to use whatever and then dump it in the trash, but because very soon I am going to run out of people to beat up and bash, I have to have some idiots who somehow like the treatment and 'rejoice, because [their] king comes' and so, roll over so that I can do as I please with them, and they will actually like it, and we can do it over and over again world without end.
They have a name for that kind of treatment, among normal people:- they call it 'sex'. Like Pratchett said, it is the 'count the legs and divide by two' type, which means the participants, or opposition, since i will be in one corner, and whoever at the moment will be in the other, will have to be lookers, and such as have not taken labour to ... obtain.
So that we can do it , as I said, over and over agin, as I vent my aggression on a bunch of women who , as I said, like that treatment, and will not be to hard to retain.
i will be frank; an ugly woman will ave teh following type of treatment from me, same as one that wants to be contetious, if I somehow end up with her, as I have learned from my past behaviour, as well as NOW when my aggro levels are reaching boiling point, which means i am beyond CONTEMPLATING killing people, but I am already planning on the way of doing it;-
I will start with seeing the + side, like how, at least she is... female, has a pussy, and well, i get to have sex, and God probably knows what He is doing bringing her -or more factually because you assholes do NOT know Him as I do, which is why, probably, i hate Him [which brings th point across here, is any of you shitheads so nervelss as to actually BE like me, in that regard?]- allowing her near me when He knows that I hate being bothered by shit, and then it will be like this
=>Still,no matter how I look at her, she still has the same ugly face, the same screwed on wrong head, and she wants me to actually DO things for her, with her [remember that I WILL build a spaceship, and therefore the people ... included have to be the type that I would not think twice about having near me, which means if I am NOT happy with someone,then NOTHING, no power on this earth or in heaven, no appeal, will make me keep that person near me, whatver she or anyone else may think about it all being fair, or just or whatever bullshit you may have in mind], and then, after a while, i will probably, being, as i said, aggressive, put her in a corner, and then, maybe slap her once, and we will go down that path that I have travelled so many times before, till I end up... killing her, at which point I will turn around to God, and say "fuck You for wasting my time, now i am one bitch short", at which The One Who Is and Was and Is to Come will make me realise that THIS is how come He had to sort things out BEFORE I ever got there, to the killing point, just so that, even if I do not come enough to have an outcome, like a kid, I will never be able to say, how come, as i said i would say, if you have been folling what I have said. Or Written, as the case may be, see?
or rather, READ?
Good!
Now, about the other type of ... revenge.
I spoke of how I wanted nicky? and her daughter, both of whom, incidentally came out after I had done my stringing the strings with God about revenge on michelle, who is both ugly AND contentious, and, above those bad points, a sore loser, and well, today, i was about to write them off, because i have the right to,and I am bitter, and I hate being kept waiting when the silly bitch assumes that she is somehow, on her own, important to me, or someone I can call 'my love' or some such bullshit. But, I have decided to restrain myself THIS one more time, because I have noted that even in kalk bay, the silly whore actually assume that, whenit comes to women, i am a coward, so I have sat down THIS one final time, to let it all hang out in the open, and deliver the goods as is, and then we will enjoy the killing time, since I do have women already that have 'heard' me, and will do as I please, with no strings attached, since i am finding out that whenever God intervenes, and does this "I see you My friend" bit, I can not even get a hrad on, I will just tend to be rather hard fisted, not hard dick-ed, eh?
So, then, BECAUSE she is michelle's friend, I am considering her, and ONLY because of that. To gall michelle. Same with allison, who thinks I actually care about her,or some such bullshit. I do not. Let me be plain with you, silly fool> It is because of two things that you are not on my death list, ONE being that you showed up and were some kind of buffer in my days when I moved around in S/Town, and that counts for something when the assholes there were pissing me off, AND the fact that the God Who is covering His ass against a future time when I will say, "the bitch is dead, i killed her, now You have made me lose count" never said anything against You when I was curious about whether or not you were spreading your legs to someone else, and then looking my way. Not that THAT last alone is the reason I am still thinking of you, but well, I have no reason to kill you UNTIL I have established that, so, well, you ahve, uh, I dont know, there is always this "by saturday everyone will know me" kind of deadline, so i donot know. Maybe God will wake up, and show me someone else that I can take, and I will be free to kill you BEFORE i have to do anything else to you, see, but then, it is, for the time being, in your hands, and will so remain until I free MY hands, to deal with stuff. I m working on that, yesss!
Then there are the english chick and the one with the sharp face and pretentioons to a high IQ. These I have already mentioned,and they are covered, seeing as how they bear some kind of... bearing, as far as michelle is concerned.
BUT...
I was, last night, pissed off with GOD that He was messing with my plans in that I had a thing going here; the married contemporary art chick had pissed me off, and He had been vociferous in showing me, from the 'do not harden your heart' time till the time I ended up wanting to throttle her, and I ahd done basically what I did with nicky? , in that I called out her sister, and she showed up, more obsequious, and even more eager to be around me, and show herself in her true colours, and now, there was no one with an ass like that, excpet maybe the extremely attractive chick who had gone to canada, for whom ihave plans, and now His silly rules were keeping me from doing as I saw fit with that art chick because she took me for a child, and i wanted to first of all humiliate her with a ... close... person, and THEN mangle her, and so, WTF? was the big idea with HIM.
He told me I could have my way, and so, there it is.
She will be number five, and if they all somehow get their asses away from their heads- women have only ONE head, and it should not interfere with my business, OK?- then they will probably be welcome.
Before I decide to act, because I hate being bound>
So, no one tell me tis bullhit aboy 'love' OK?
Guess there are somew omen who think this is all, or should be, or will be (once i get my head straight and stop thinking with my dick, or something), about THEM, but that is not the case.unfortunately, I find myself having only ONE focus in life, and that, weirdly enough, is the source of my exuberant bellicosity, as well as my libido.
I HATE.
period.
God, and His uninvited inclusion into my life, and His advice, have stirred up the muddy waters for a while, and as a resuly, I have had to ... think... to find out what it is I want in life, or out of it, in every sense of the word, and I have discovered that I would hate very much to be God's puppet. THAT is my main concern, but if He steps aside and lets me do my shit, then I have only one aim in mind, revenge, and war, and will use whatever I have to to achieve that end.
At this point God, however, seems to want a piece, because i would be content to use whatever and then dump it in the trash, but because very soon I am going to run out of people to beat up and bash, I have to have some idiots who somehow like the treatment and 'rejoice, because [their] king comes' and so, roll over so that I can do as I please with them, and they will actually like it, and we can do it over and over again world without end.
They have a name for that kind of treatment, among normal people:- they call it 'sex'. Like Pratchett said, it is the 'count the legs and divide by two' type, which means the participants, or opposition, since i will be in one corner, and whoever at the moment will be in the other, will have to be lookers, and such as have not taken labour to ... obtain.
So that we can do it , as I said, over and over agin, as I vent my aggression on a bunch of women who , as I said, like that treatment, and will not be to hard to retain.
i will be frank; an ugly woman will ave teh following type of treatment from me, same as one that wants to be contetious, if I somehow end up with her, as I have learned from my past behaviour, as well as NOW when my aggro levels are reaching boiling point, which means i am beyond CONTEMPLATING killing people, but I am already planning on the way of doing it;-
I will start with seeing the + side, like how, at least she is... female, has a pussy, and well, i get to have sex, and God probably knows what He is doing bringing her -or more factually because you assholes do NOT know Him as I do, which is why, probably, i hate Him [which brings th point across here, is any of you shitheads so nervelss as to actually BE like me, in that regard?]- allowing her near me when He knows that I hate being bothered by shit, and then it will be like this
=>Still,no matter how I look at her, she still has the same ugly face, the same screwed on wrong head, and she wants me to actually DO things for her, with her [remember that I WILL build a spaceship, and therefore the people ... included have to be the type that I would not think twice about having near me, which means if I am NOT happy with someone,then NOTHING, no power on this earth or in heaven, no appeal, will make me keep that person near me, whatver she or anyone else may think about it all being fair, or just or whatever bullshit you may have in mind], and then, after a while, i will probably, being, as i said, aggressive, put her in a corner, and then, maybe slap her once, and we will go down that path that I have travelled so many times before, till I end up... killing her, at which point I will turn around to God, and say "fuck You for wasting my time, now i am one bitch short", at which The One Who Is and Was and Is to Come will make me realise that THIS is how come He had to sort things out BEFORE I ever got there, to the killing point, just so that, even if I do not come enough to have an outcome, like a kid, I will never be able to say, how come, as i said i would say, if you have been folling what I have said. Or Written, as the case may be, see?
or rather, READ?
Good!
Now, about the other type of ... revenge.
I spoke of how I wanted nicky? and her daughter, both of whom, incidentally came out after I had done my stringing the strings with God about revenge on michelle, who is both ugly AND contentious, and, above those bad points, a sore loser, and well, today, i was about to write them off, because i have the right to,and I am bitter, and I hate being kept waiting when the silly bitch assumes that she is somehow, on her own, important to me, or someone I can call 'my love' or some such bullshit. But, I have decided to restrain myself THIS one more time, because I have noted that even in kalk bay, the silly whore actually assume that, whenit comes to women, i am a coward, so I have sat down THIS one final time, to let it all hang out in the open, and deliver the goods as is, and then we will enjoy the killing time, since I do have women already that have 'heard' me, and will do as I please, with no strings attached, since i am finding out that whenever God intervenes, and does this "I see you My friend" bit, I can not even get a hrad on, I will just tend to be rather hard fisted, not hard dick-ed, eh?
So, then, BECAUSE she is michelle's friend, I am considering her, and ONLY because of that. To gall michelle. Same with allison, who thinks I actually care about her,or some such bullshit. I do not. Let me be plain with you, silly fool> It is because of two things that you are not on my death list, ONE being that you showed up and were some kind of buffer in my days when I moved around in S/Town, and that counts for something when the assholes there were pissing me off, AND the fact that the God Who is covering His ass against a future time when I will say, "the bitch is dead, i killed her, now You have made me lose count" never said anything against You when I was curious about whether or not you were spreading your legs to someone else, and then looking my way. Not that THAT last alone is the reason I am still thinking of you, but well, I have no reason to kill you UNTIL I have established that, so, well, you ahve, uh, I dont know, there is always this "by saturday everyone will know me" kind of deadline, so i donot know. Maybe God will wake up, and show me someone else that I can take, and I will be free to kill you BEFORE i have to do anything else to you, see, but then, it is, for the time being, in your hands, and will so remain until I free MY hands, to deal with stuff. I m working on that, yesss!
Then there are the english chick and the one with the sharp face and pretentioons to a high IQ. These I have already mentioned,and they are covered, seeing as how they bear some kind of... bearing, as far as michelle is concerned.
BUT...
I was, last night, pissed off with GOD that He was messing with my plans in that I had a thing going here; the married contemporary art chick had pissed me off, and He had been vociferous in showing me, from the 'do not harden your heart' time till the time I ended up wanting to throttle her, and I ahd done basically what I did with nicky? , in that I called out her sister, and she showed up, more obsequious, and even more eager to be around me, and show herself in her true colours, and now, there was no one with an ass like that, excpet maybe the extremely attractive chick who had gone to canada, for whom ihave plans, and now His silly rules were keeping me from doing as I saw fit with that art chick because she took me for a child, and i wanted to first of all humiliate her with a ... close... person, and THEN mangle her, and so, WTF? was the big idea with HIM.
He told me I could have my way, and so, there it is.
She will be number five, and if they all somehow get their asses away from their heads- women have only ONE head, and it should not interfere with my business, OK?- then they will probably be welcome.
Before I decide to act, because I hate being bound>
So, no one tell me tis bullhit aboy 'love' OK?
