Two guys are co-pilots for the first time, both American, one Chinese and the other Jewish, and the Jew, the chief pilot, says
"I hate the Chinese!"
After a silence the chink asks,
"Why?"
"They bombed pearl harbour".
"But it was not the Chinese, it was the JAPANESE that did that!"
"Chinese, Japanese, Korean, no difference, all are the same. I hate them yellow bastards!"
After a few moments of frozen silence, the junior goes
"I hate Jews!"
"Oh, and WHY would that be?"
"They sank the Titanic!"
"But... but... THAT was an ICEBERG!"
"Iceberg, Goldberg, Steinberg, Gutenberg;- all the same, I hate the shyster bastards!"
Well, you probably may not know it, but I am hating EVERYTHING about this whole place. I mean, it reminds me of the time when I had left home, made it across the border into Botswana without a cent or even a passport [WELL, as there are no "ports" anyway between zim and bots, I did not NEED one, did I?] and then I am two days in the country and I start wondering what I could be having at home right now if I was not so stubborn, and think that I should be making my way back, even if I knew it was hell. Like now, I could be even TEACHING extra math, or doing something constructive instead of trying to take over the world, and living on a mountain and stuff, and, if I had JUST been more... or rather; LESS myself, I could even be a respectable member of society and learn to get along with people and even maybe have a car... or a bike, yes definitely, a super bike with twin exhausts and ridiculous speed, like that Yamaha V-Max, yes?
I mean, I could be a millionaire, if I had not let my stubbornness NOT to have my mother enjoy any of the fruits of MY labour get in the way. I could even, come to think of it, NOT have met God at all if only I had gotten on the taxi like I should have, that night, instead of walking home just so that I prolong the wait till I have to face that dreaded hag!
Now look where it has gotten me? Here, in the fucking rain, having to THINK about everything and decide what I want everything to look like, and being egged on by God, and wondering who between me and Him, is crazier, because he is letting me get away with silly stuff, and in LESS that three days I turn 31, and THAT means my birthday present will be people dying like flies... or more correctly, moths... and I am, till then, stuck on a mountain side, without even a book to read to pass away the time, and I am raking my brain as to what to do, and all I do is come back again and again to the same thing;- I really HATE this whole place, and when I DO leave, I will definitely NOT let it remain... intact.
I mean, anyone with half a brain who has ever climbed any mountain can see that if ever a tidal wave was to make its way HERE, it would wipe away EVERYTHING, and since that is so tempting, I want it so badly I can almost see it. I mean, imagine the bit that has Simonstown and Glencairn just goes back underwater suddenly, all of it [since I can not be certain that red hill will be destroyed by a tsunami, and heck I HATED it there as well] and thus all the houses that are THERE will be destroyed, and I will not be left with a feeling that the places I struggled in are still going on about their business like everything is the same;- well, the inrush and collision of water WOULD generate a wave so huge it would lay waste to ALL of the False bay, and thus, from Ocean View to Gordonsbaai, all these places would be denuded and frankly, no buildings are likely to remain, right?
better make that certain:- I WANT no building left standing in the whole of the area, from Cape Town itself all the way down, since I regard the whole place with a feeling of great disgust.
Simonstown especially, where people had nothing better to do than to spy on me with telescopes and make me feel like I am living in a zoo, and then drive up and down as if I would be impressed and ... happy... that someone was blowing smoke in my face because I am to them some kind of clown?
Fuck, I want them all homeless, and they will KNOW, those left alive anyway, how it feels to have as your basic worry where you are going to put your head to rest, yesss!
I am tearing off the VERY FOUNDATIONS of your societies, you cunts, and making you howl, because you thought you were secure on your high places and now, I am jerking the carpet from under your feet, and all the pyramids of your glory that you based all your security on will be no refuge, fools!
OH, do not worry, I will show you that I am not renowned [ha ha!] for my mercy, because I have none, and I hate with a steady flame, a continuous, destructive force that will leave no stone unturned till I get to the very ground level, to rock bottom, where one can sink no more, and there I will plant MY peg, driving it firmly into the spot where you thought NOTHING could penetrate, yesss!
I HATE False Bay!
Well, I may as well read a book by Pratchett, and while away the time till I have to go... cook.
THAT means I have to drag logs all the way down, or up, and ... fuck, where is the adventure in THAT!
I HATE this mountain.
Maybe it should just explode into a million pieces, yesss! It should, right? IT WILL!
