So, I shifted, after the fire I had built had gone so out of control it burned the back of my coat, went through and burnt my favourite green vest, and left me... without a vested... interest!
Found this place the other day, when I was collecting wood, and it was so, nice after the other guy's cave, but I thought, nah, let me leave it, I am tough. But this morning I went there, and cursed myself for a fool for delaying so long.
The cave is so hidden that no-one would ever know it exists, and the wind is a stranger there, and the floor is not so hard, it is coated with dead leaves that have gathered there for so long they make a carpet, and some guys obligingly cut down trees around it so I have a big collection of firewood.
MY point is; it had occurred to me to... cheat... even though I know that i am a person who hates being... grateful.
Almost, before I left the cave I was in, I was about to try to twist some arms so i could get a place to stay, but then, I was never good at being kept, and well, things may change, but I do not.
What I mean is, I suppose the reason why one of the silly bitches, butt-head's mom, kept coming and throwing things my way was because she though I was going to end up asking her to make herself available and/or her daughters, and by doing this, cause her to have a bargaining tool by which to let her son off the hook.
As I said, though, I am going to kill the ass-hole, and her too, and her kids, and their cats and all, and this is no joke.
but that is not the reason why i am looking so... longingly... at allison.
look, in maybe two days time, if, after i have set things out for everyone to see, and if tomorrow i have nothing further to add or remove; I have no REASON to hold back anymore; I am going to say to God, "Ok, let it rip...", and THEN it will be just time for blood and guts.
but the reason why I have been so taken with allison is that, even before i was aware that she was with the osc and thus privy to my posts, she showed up, and even at times that I did not mention, she was always rather visible, and what REALLY bowled me over was that, AFTER I mentioned about my... self-induced... terminal illness, she showed up still, the same day that butt-head's mom did.
Now, look at things from my point of view; even after I am healed, and have gathered the 15 women and the girl to myself, and they have READ these posts of mine, they will look at me like some very weird kind of freak, and I will definitely feel the heat.
So, I guess the complement was lacking someone who... cheated... and yet was there all the time, to sort of stabilise things.
I want allison,because I want her, and because I have nothing against her... ok, nothing much... and because she is so stunningly attractive and i would like to know as early as possible if she would be willing to be around AFTER things happen, and so, make it less awkward for people and myself to... get along.
like maybe before tomorrow's post.
I mean that is when I would like to know.
If not, hey, its her choice. I am still... unwell. And gone are the days of mixing love with hate, now I hate my enemies, and kiss my women, and the two do not mix.So, I am not asking her to have anything to do with me, just to let me know where she stands, and then, I go to my cave, watch as Khayelitsha is downded, and take it for granted that zuma and his deputy are also on their way to hell, and... no... there will be no darkness, because I want that ONLY when I am out to kill. For now, when the people realise who is responsible, they will unfetter what is mine, and let my women come and THEN, when all of them are with me, which is the time when I will already have been healed, since THAT happens with the loss of control of any other power on earth [I mean demons and the spirit] and my consequent freedom from any ailment, THEN, I will hunt down the fools of the osc who made me mad with rage and show just why i am a 'son of thunder'.
I am not, there fore, in the mood currently for socialising, because I am on a mission, and having women around me at present would be an irritation. And i do not tolerate irritations.
As for the americans, their day comes when I start moving around;- obama, that clown, has till then to have it sink in that the 'boss' is here, the one who will send him and his family and the whole white house building straight to hell, and then face the vice-president and ask him to remove every one of the 'americans' in alaska from my new domain, and prepare lodgings and infrastructure fit for the only ruler of the earth. If the fools does not heed THAT, then both he and his and the state of california will go... down, after his boss.
the day I go after my enemies in simonstown is the day the american president dies, and the day the darkness begins. I am NOT a fool, to want to have the cold come when I am exposed.
And, Ok, while it would have been fun, I have no real reason to destroy the western cape. some people in it have been very nice, like this kind old lady who gives out bread in the morning to needy people. I have her bread with me as I sit here. It starts you up good for the day.
so, fuck, I will leave things be, although I am definitely ... interested ... in having my cousin in my grasp, because I want to break his neck... personally!
As for the girls I fooled around with,hey, maybe they though then they had the upper hand, but when they see the person I have become, and so, have it known that I was using them and not just the other way around, I think they are the ones who will wish they had never been entangled with me.
my revenge will be complete.
Although I find that, when it comes to allison, I am not so sure I CAN let her go.
I wonder if she wants me to.
that would be the first... unnatural... thing that has ever happened to me, because I NEVER show any interest in someone unless she evinces some first.
And I KNOW what I saw, and so, I am pretty sure that, unless she is a very good actor, the woman will... ah fuck, I will wait and see!
And keep my big mouth shut!
if you really wanna party with me
let me see ....
put your hands where my eyes can see
let me see ....
put your hands where my eyes can see
