Fucked up YouTube does not have the song I want, or I am typing in the wrong search words, but the lyrics, which are of importance, go, and yes, when I focused on the song yesterday, they resonated with me so much I felt more of my fear go away[ which is something I feel I must explain, because my inactivity has a lot to do with that, and maybe it is time everything just was reduced to 'plain and simple'], and they are by a guy who goes by the name Bling Dawg;-
mi nuh care who you be
just look pon the gun where man are bust
just look pon the gun where man are bust
from daylight to dusk
no fuss nor fir trust
badness degree
fool ca' you think you could be like us
badness degree
fool ca' you think you could be like us
when they hassle up about, no puss about
Now, Ok, this is the deal, with everything, see?
God intervened in my life from the beginning, yes?, and by so doing gave up the ... right... to actually tell me what to do, or to reprove me, is that in any way CLEAR? I mean, of course He is God and everywhere He is depicted as being the absolute authority on everything, telling people, like jeremiah, that "You WILL go where I tell you...", et.c., but when it comes to me, He has NO such grounds. Why? because He decided to act ONLY when I decided that there is NO way such a thing, (any issue, not Him telling me what to do, that is) can happen, and then He and I together explore just HOW I REALLY would have liked something to be, if i had ... uh... all the power in the world, see? of course, I resent Him, and of course, I am NOT happy that He is in my life, because I REALLY would like to be dead, but, that aside, He says, "be Yourself", which means that I am NOT, at present, or was NOT, being really pointedly MYSELF, because, I was afraid that all this would backfire in my face, see?
but I have discovered that the earth is mine to control, and more than that, I am in the process of delving deeper into His take on people, and well, when I am prejudiced, I am REALLY prejudiced, and so, I have people, peoples, that I REALLY have decided I do not want on earth, and the past few days I have been studying things to see if He has anything to say to make me suffer them fools to remain alive, but yesterday, i set that issue partly to rest, and so, now, i have only ONE problem, and I am worried sick about it, her, because every way that I look at it, I still worry about the fact that it appears inevitable that I am going to kill her, and if there ever existed anyone i would have liked with me, it is her, but, well, one thing at a time.
I am sure that you fools really see yourselves as being important, but then that is only to yourselves, and the past few days, I have been watching and seeing them fools that I specifically told to stay out of my way, keep on trying to correct me, and i have decided to add on to the death list, because it irritates me to be laughed at by fools who treat me like a child who, because i eat something, am therefore a changed person, and they decide to walk by, to 'remind' me of terms and conditions. REALLY? well, I said that NO ONE even the apple chick, has ANY say on who lives or dies, and so, if ANYONE pisses me off, and she tries to intervene on that person's behalf, i will kill her as well, because I have NO equal, to tell me what to do, because she shows me everytime how she despises me by her selective take on what i say, like I am a baby to be cuddled. She really takes me for a fool, that woman,which is one reason why I am thinking that I will really have to kill her. For example, I stated that i was going to destroy everything that mike built, because of how she pissed me off, and the following morning, I saw goatface and the imp walking past me, gave the building a finger, and she was out in a flush, with her indignation clearly heard in the way her irritating high heels beat a tattoo on the pavement as she marched right up to me and past as she walked to that 'cottage', trying to yank my chain, and thus, teach me to mind my p's and q's. I had my back to her, and i ignored her when she walked back again, and whether she got the message or not, that i do NOT negotiate, that those i said are dead, are DEAD, and she still assumed i would be pleased with the mere sight of her. What the fuck does she take me for? I am a laughing stock everywhere because of her, and she thinks she is in a position to TELL me how to live my life? Cunt!
The next day, there she is, after i, being full blooded, looked at women, and was trying to decide just how to level the whole building and the whole of kalk bay, and was thinking that the reason why I can NOT at present do so was this woman who out of the kindness of her heart brings us food, and makes my bitterness more tolerable, and, she stays at the back of the building, and a flood would endanger vinnie, and the moment i am looking at the building, out comes butthead ii, and i am supposed, i take it, to think that if i want HER- like i went LOOKING for her, the silly breastless bitch!- let him off the hook when they all come out to test the waters to see if it is safe, or if they are walking on thin ice. So, again, I walked away, and she waits till I come back, and then she drives to the harbour house, comes back dressed in a one piece that shows her legs to everyone, and she waits till Iturn and look at her provocative car parked right where i can see, to alight, to show me that she is... sexy? Dressed like a bitch! And I am supposed to be amused that she is showing her legs to everyone, and publicly exposing me to ridicule while everyone's eyes are glued to the windows or screens to see how the idiot will react, and she does NOT understand IT that I am pissed off? before all that, I had seen her in a long white dress, walking past, and then, maybe she does not understand why i am NOT taken in by her like that, when she is making me public ridicule by parading my... affection... for everyone to see? And I am standing right there, and she is doing what she is doing for the cameras, and i am to be impressed by her, when I TOLD her that she had either totally ignore me or come out of that irritating situation, because I will suffer her presumption no longer?
Cunt!
BUT, now that this ONE fear is out in the open, I have this to say!I do not care about anyone else, and anyone who has put his or her fingers in my business, and I will be painfully blunt!
I am leaving alive only the people that i have seen or met and approved off, and that means those i have hated and despised are dead, and that means all the chinese-YEAH-SS- all the church people who still came my way, all the people who shoved their faces into my path, like even the colourd people and those i had promised amnesty, fuck, I hate you all, and you will DIE, and that is final. Fucking cunts and assholes. The jews and everyone else not in this part of africa are ALL dead, regardless of where, and I am on the warpath, even though the weather is fine! Fools!
God intervened in my life from the beginning, yes?, and by so doing gave up the ... right... to actually tell me what to do, or to reprove me, is that in any way CLEAR? I mean, of course He is God and everywhere He is depicted as being the absolute authority on everything, telling people, like jeremiah, that "You WILL go where I tell you...", et.c., but when it comes to me, He has NO such grounds. Why? because He decided to act ONLY when I decided that there is NO way such a thing, (any issue, not Him telling me what to do, that is) can happen, and then He and I together explore just HOW I REALLY would have liked something to be, if i had ... uh... all the power in the world, see? of course, I resent Him, and of course, I am NOT happy that He is in my life, because I REALLY would like to be dead, but, that aside, He says, "be Yourself", which means that I am NOT, at present, or was NOT, being really pointedly MYSELF, because, I was afraid that all this would backfire in my face, see?
but I have discovered that the earth is mine to control, and more than that, I am in the process of delving deeper into His take on people, and well, when I am prejudiced, I am REALLY prejudiced, and so, I have people, peoples, that I REALLY have decided I do not want on earth, and the past few days I have been studying things to see if He has anything to say to make me suffer them fools to remain alive, but yesterday, i set that issue partly to rest, and so, now, i have only ONE problem, and I am worried sick about it, her, because every way that I look at it, I still worry about the fact that it appears inevitable that I am going to kill her, and if there ever existed anyone i would have liked with me, it is her, but, well, one thing at a time.
I am sure that you fools really see yourselves as being important, but then that is only to yourselves, and the past few days, I have been watching and seeing them fools that I specifically told to stay out of my way, keep on trying to correct me, and i have decided to add on to the death list, because it irritates me to be laughed at by fools who treat me like a child who, because i eat something, am therefore a changed person, and they decide to walk by, to 'remind' me of terms and conditions. REALLY? well, I said that NO ONE even the apple chick, has ANY say on who lives or dies, and so, if ANYONE pisses me off, and she tries to intervene on that person's behalf, i will kill her as well, because I have NO equal, to tell me what to do, because she shows me everytime how she despises me by her selective take on what i say, like I am a baby to be cuddled. She really takes me for a fool, that woman,which is one reason why I am thinking that I will really have to kill her. For example, I stated that i was going to destroy everything that mike built, because of how she pissed me off, and the following morning, I saw goatface and the imp walking past me, gave the building a finger, and she was out in a flush, with her indignation clearly heard in the way her irritating high heels beat a tattoo on the pavement as she marched right up to me and past as she walked to that 'cottage', trying to yank my chain, and thus, teach me to mind my p's and q's. I had my back to her, and i ignored her when she walked back again, and whether she got the message or not, that i do NOT negotiate, that those i said are dead, are DEAD, and she still assumed i would be pleased with the mere sight of her. What the fuck does she take me for? I am a laughing stock everywhere because of her, and she thinks she is in a position to TELL me how to live my life? Cunt!
The next day, there she is, after i, being full blooded, looked at women, and was trying to decide just how to level the whole building and the whole of kalk bay, and was thinking that the reason why I can NOT at present do so was this woman who out of the kindness of her heart brings us food, and makes my bitterness more tolerable, and, she stays at the back of the building, and a flood would endanger vinnie, and the moment i am looking at the building, out comes butthead ii, and i am supposed, i take it, to think that if i want HER- like i went LOOKING for her, the silly breastless bitch!- let him off the hook when they all come out to test the waters to see if it is safe, or if they are walking on thin ice. So, again, I walked away, and she waits till I come back, and then she drives to the harbour house, comes back dressed in a one piece that shows her legs to everyone, and she waits till Iturn and look at her provocative car parked right where i can see, to alight, to show me that she is... sexy? Dressed like a bitch! And I am supposed to be amused that she is showing her legs to everyone, and publicly exposing me to ridicule while everyone's eyes are glued to the windows or screens to see how the idiot will react, and she does NOT understand IT that I am pissed off? before all that, I had seen her in a long white dress, walking past, and then, maybe she does not understand why i am NOT taken in by her like that, when she is making me public ridicule by parading my... affection... for everyone to see? And I am standing right there, and she is doing what she is doing for the cameras, and i am to be impressed by her, when I TOLD her that she had either totally ignore me or come out of that irritating situation, because I will suffer her presumption no longer?
Cunt!
BUT, now that this ONE fear is out in the open, I have this to say!I do not care about anyone else, and anyone who has put his or her fingers in my business, and I will be painfully blunt!
I am leaving alive only the people that i have seen or met and approved off, and that means those i have hated and despised are dead, and that means all the chinese-YEAH-SS- all the church people who still came my way, all the people who shoved their faces into my path, like even the colourd people and those i had promised amnesty, fuck, I hate you all, and you will DIE, and that is final. Fucking cunts and assholes. The jews and everyone else not in this part of africa are ALL dead, regardless of where, and I am on the warpath, even though the weather is fine! Fools!
