Watershed Moment? No Such Luck
Maybe it is because I have a sense of the ridiculous, but my initial ire at getting off the train and walking up the mountain last night and then finding out that not only was there no WIND, there was not even a hint of rain, made me lose it a bit. Then, I remembered the statement by king julien, in "madagascar 2: escape 2 africa", "how could I have been so wrong, the science seemed so... solid!", and I was laughing myself to sleep!
He had also said, earlier in the movie, "What, suddenly throwing a giraffe into a volcano in order to make water is CRAZY?", and hell, just recalling that made me almost double up. Ok, I have been wrong about God before, lots of times, and it is almost dead certain that whatever He says I will take the wrong way first time. So, maybe I let my desire to kill off everyone get the better of me, and ... mistook... what He may have meant by "this time next week".
I would have preferred rain, torrents of it, and people dying, and earthquakes and all that, instead of being forced to ... wait, again. And know that what seemed so 'solid' is actually NOT going to happen anytime soon, I am not going to be rid of you people violating my personal space quite that easy. You know, I really think being alone is quite a good idea. It is looking more attractive by the minute!
Instead, I have to think about the fact that, because, primarily of the fact that I would have a rather ... dimmer... future, which according to my minder and to God is NOT necessary, I must stick it out, and see where this all ends.
I do not for the moment believe she is worth it. For one thing, while I admit that she has behaved unlike any woman I have seen before, in that every other woman, once she knows about... sex...., will, like a driver who knows a shortcut, go from "you are looking at me", to "come on, you know what you want, what power i have over you, so, lets cut the crap, how much are you prepared to cough up?" in an instant; well, she may not have behaved LIKE that in her personal approach to me, but she definitely left me in no doubt that that was in her mind.
I do not do bargains.
Not of that kind.
Rumble is there to make sure that I do not bow down to anyone, while at the same time getting what I want, which leaves ME at this time in a sort of no man's land.
Fuck, do not think much of the cloud cover now, it will rain when I'm done, and you will die then.
Besides, it is one thing to look at a woman and like the way she looks at you, but it is like looking at an apple that you bite into and finding there is only half a worm there, right where you have bitten into, when I think of the fact that she deliberately set herself and the pretender up for 'The Kiss', and for me, she became spoiled. Hell, that was it, for me. I kept up some momentum, but now, all I REALLY want is to move on. I have had all the rubbish I can stand. Fuck it, let me get out of here and have them fools make me more angry, so I can kill them sooner!
This is a fucking waste of time!
