That was my thought as i witnessed pretty much what I had predicted would happen, and then, when I said to God, "See, You Asshole, what I said would happen IS happening", now, step aside and let me destroy them fools, and He said, again, "you're going home with Me tonight", and refused to let me have my fury unleashed, and had me sit and wait the entire day through, watching, and wondering if the woman is REALLY that stupid that she really does not understand when I SAY that there will NEVER be a reverse in direction as far as MY sentence of the fools- and her- is concerned, because she persists in insulting me by thinking me a mere person, and NOT the Almighty.
Apparently she IS right, because it is only NOW that I get it that I am still in ... waiting... for my power from on high, which is what the song meansm if i can get it on YouTube
Not Yet Uhuru...
like, if i use what i know of my language and the bit of history I know, I am not yet...
GREAT.
Why?
Because He said, "Sit at my right hand till I make your enemies your footstool", like, see, until He brings them down, to under my feet.
How? because He pointed out, ages ago, that, well when they knew what drove me, then they would have no place to hide, and no place to run, see?
Well, see this is the thing.
the mav. GREW up hating people, every single person, and has wanted to eliminate every single person from the planet, because DEATH IS preferable to breathing the same air as everyone else. When God showed up and said I MUST be MYSELF, and refused to let me die, but even went so far as to tell me that He had added 15 years to my life, HE had already PROMISED that I would be high and exalted when I stopped paying lip service to God, and well, God, in my life, is an... extra.[Isaiah 6; 1-13, anyone? I mean, COME on!]
I found myself hating the thought of actually getting to heaven one day and then seeing/meeting God while in the company of the woman I love, who today caused me to look really hard at her and make me think deeply about alternatives; and found NONE but that I WILL kill the people she surrounds herself with, and the choice of me sending them to hell ... personally... or just having them sent to hell is ... HERS, still.
No, I do NOT share my interests with anyone, and so, the .... crocodile... wants it all for himself, and I am NOT going to be reasonable about it.I AM going to go to the US, and NOTHING and NO ONE will stop me, because I am dead set on it, and while there I WILL build me a spaceship and try to find out whether i really COULD have survived without a renewable water supply, but fact remains, that this world has claimed me for itself, so I am NOT going to let anyone else inhabit it, NO.
This is how my day went/started.
I got up very early, went to kalk bay, walked actually, from lakeside station, and then as soon as I got there, I found abisha already displaying stuff and two things immediately became apparent to me, that set the tone for the day far as i am concerned, and that was, the tall chap who dresses in shorts walking past me soon as i showed up, and ms-i-know-it-all also showing up and walking by me, and i was like, WTF?
So, of course, i was NOT really surprised when the love of my life- hell, I love the chick, and while I hate the thought of still waiting, I am not so unhappy that I did- drive her car right up to the entrance of the office building, and sit a while in it, while I waited behind her to confront her, or laugh, or something, and then when I got fed up with waiting, I decided to walk out to her, and go, "YES!" in triumph, while she turned and faced me, and then I was suddenly hit by a jolt as I was going, inwards, "Well, see, God, I told You she will stick to mr money bags and listen to her mother, FUCK this, I am going to kill them all", and she got out of her car, with her shades, and she walked to the bakery, she had a coffee mug in her hand, and she came out again, and we made eye contact, because she was no longer wearing her shades, and I was seriously buffeted, but I shrugged it off, going, well, fuck, she IS just manipulating me, woman doesn't LOVE me at all, she is just using all her charms to her advantage, to make me into some servant, and so I just carried on with my day... wanting change seriously because there was no point to waiting.
After she had settled down, I saw ms short and dumpy appear, and the other 'brother' with the formal shirts, (not the one she was kissing, who, even if it turned out I got to be in a good mood and decided NOT to kill everyone else at once but let them live awhile till they just became like the piranha, will NOT live, because, fuck it the idiot pissed me off with that woman, and I can NEVER let that go, so he pays the ULTIMATE price, and goes to hell, or I send him feet first, either way I am game) and I watched as ms short and dumpy strengthened him just as he had strengthened the apple of my eye to defy me, and he did so, and I was watching -it must be the donkey-like jaw, or the dumpiness that gives the woman stubbornness, I THINK I would really enjoy making all her nightmares come true, the silly little fool- and the fool walks past and so, I tried to mimic to the apple of my eye that I was about to mangle the fool the moment he comes out, and then, just as I was about to, God stepped in with His "Not yet" speech and I was like... FUCK You, why NOT?
I mean, it was hot and I hate the heat, but when I tried to ... THINK... clouds, I got a thin waffer that suddenly disappeared the moment I figured it was too... heavy... that i was fighting not just myself but the inclinations of my own heart.
So, I decided to watch her, and observe.
And got ... told... what a coincidence, that the coloured guy she was with in the car episode was an entrusted courier... hmm.... but everyone was jittery. Mike at first wanted to be friendly when i came and sat near his car because I wanted to see the woman in action, and I ignored him-there are NO pacts between lions and men, and as i see things, he is involved with the woman I love. And I am jealous, and what is more, MY lealousy can be quite lethal, yes?
the more he keeps her under his influence, the greater MY anger is going to be, because, truth to be told, I HATE her working for anyone. I want her free of any such bonds, and COMPLETELY mine, with no extraneous luggage, OR, I am about to be as unreasonable as a ... spoiled ... God who is used to having his own way can ONLY be.
I do not suppose that anyone will actually ENJOY the experience, NO!
Guess it boils down to THIS, then, that the girl is MINE, I want her, and I am quite happy to destroy everything and everyone that stands in my way, tries to persuade me to do other things and also, I will not have her for public show for anyone else's benefit.
She MUST be mine, and mine alone, and I am not interested in hiding this ... longing... under some kind of civilised bullshit.
What is MINE I keep, for MYSELF, for MY pleasure, and do not SHARE it with anyone, NO.
So, I will probably have to remove the rug from under everyone else's feet and destroy their puny lives in the process, OR, well, she could just make it easy for me, and just walk away from them, and they, because they are NOT of any interest to me, will probably get to live, for a little longer, of course.
And I am made for war!
Apparently she IS right, because it is only NOW that I get it that I am still in ... waiting... for my power from on high, which is what the song meansm if i can get it on YouTube
Not Yet Uhuru...
like, if i use what i know of my language and the bit of history I know, I am not yet...
GREAT.
Because He said, "Sit at my right hand till I make your enemies your footstool", like, see, until He brings them down, to under my feet.
How? because He pointed out, ages ago, that, well when they knew what drove me, then they would have no place to hide, and no place to run, see?
Well, see this is the thing.
the mav. GREW up hating people, every single person, and has wanted to eliminate every single person from the planet, because DEATH IS preferable to breathing the same air as everyone else. When God showed up and said I MUST be MYSELF, and refused to let me die, but even went so far as to tell me that He had added 15 years to my life, HE had already PROMISED that I would be high and exalted when I stopped paying lip service to God, and well, God, in my life, is an... extra.[Isaiah 6; 1-13, anyone? I mean, COME on!]
I found myself hating the thought of actually getting to heaven one day and then seeing/meeting God while in the company of the woman I love, who today caused me to look really hard at her and make me think deeply about alternatives; and found NONE but that I WILL kill the people she surrounds herself with, and the choice of me sending them to hell ... personally... or just having them sent to hell is ... HERS, still.
No, I do NOT share my interests with anyone, and so, the .... crocodile... wants it all for himself, and I am NOT going to be reasonable about it.I AM going to go to the US, and NOTHING and NO ONE will stop me, because I am dead set on it, and while there I WILL build me a spaceship and try to find out whether i really COULD have survived without a renewable water supply, but fact remains, that this world has claimed me for itself, so I am NOT going to let anyone else inhabit it, NO.
This is how my day went/started.
I got up very early, went to kalk bay, walked actually, from lakeside station, and then as soon as I got there, I found abisha already displaying stuff and two things immediately became apparent to me, that set the tone for the day far as i am concerned, and that was, the tall chap who dresses in shorts walking past me soon as i showed up, and ms-i-know-it-all also showing up and walking by me, and i was like, WTF?
So, of course, i was NOT really surprised when the love of my life- hell, I love the chick, and while I hate the thought of still waiting, I am not so unhappy that I did- drive her car right up to the entrance of the office building, and sit a while in it, while I waited behind her to confront her, or laugh, or something, and then when I got fed up with waiting, I decided to walk out to her, and go, "YES!" in triumph, while she turned and faced me, and then I was suddenly hit by a jolt as I was going, inwards, "Well, see, God, I told You she will stick to mr money bags and listen to her mother, FUCK this, I am going to kill them all", and she got out of her car, with her shades, and she walked to the bakery, she had a coffee mug in her hand, and she came out again, and we made eye contact, because she was no longer wearing her shades, and I was seriously buffeted, but I shrugged it off, going, well, fuck, she IS just manipulating me, woman doesn't LOVE me at all, she is just using all her charms to her advantage, to make me into some servant, and so I just carried on with my day... wanting change seriously because there was no point to waiting.
After she had settled down, I saw ms short and dumpy appear, and the other 'brother' with the formal shirts, (not the one she was kissing, who, even if it turned out I got to be in a good mood and decided NOT to kill everyone else at once but let them live awhile till they just became like the piranha, will NOT live, because, fuck it the idiot pissed me off with that woman, and I can NEVER let that go, so he pays the ULTIMATE price, and goes to hell, or I send him feet first, either way I am game) and I watched as ms short and dumpy strengthened him just as he had strengthened the apple of my eye to defy me, and he did so, and I was watching -it must be the donkey-like jaw, or the dumpiness that gives the woman stubbornness, I THINK I would really enjoy making all her nightmares come true, the silly little fool- and the fool walks past and so, I tried to mimic to the apple of my eye that I was about to mangle the fool the moment he comes out, and then, just as I was about to, God stepped in with His "Not yet" speech and I was like... FUCK You, why NOT?
I mean, it was hot and I hate the heat, but when I tried to ... THINK... clouds, I got a thin waffer that suddenly disappeared the moment I figured it was too... heavy... that i was fighting not just myself but the inclinations of my own heart.
So, I decided to watch her, and observe.
And got ... told... what a coincidence, that the coloured guy she was with in the car episode was an entrusted courier... hmm.... but everyone was jittery. Mike at first wanted to be friendly when i came and sat near his car because I wanted to see the woman in action, and I ignored him-there are NO pacts between lions and men, and as i see things, he is involved with the woman I love. And I am jealous, and what is more, MY lealousy can be quite lethal, yes?
the more he keeps her under his influence, the greater MY anger is going to be, because, truth to be told, I HATE her working for anyone. I want her free of any such bonds, and COMPLETELY mine, with no extraneous luggage, OR, I am about to be as unreasonable as a ... spoiled ... God who is used to having his own way can ONLY be.
I do not suppose that anyone will actually ENJOY the experience, NO!
Guess it boils down to THIS, then, that the girl is MINE, I want her, and I am quite happy to destroy everything and everyone that stands in my way, tries to persuade me to do other things and also, I will not have her for public show for anyone else's benefit.
She MUST be mine, and mine alone, and I am not interested in hiding this ... longing... under some kind of civilised bullshit.
What is MINE I keep, for MYSELF, for MY pleasure, and do not SHARE it with anyone, NO.
So, I will probably have to remove the rug from under everyone else's feet and destroy their puny lives in the process, OR, well, she could just make it easy for me, and just walk away from them, and they, because they are NOT of any interest to me, will probably get to live, for a little longer, of course.
them know me nuh scared me now
them know me nuh fearing now
TITAN
them are chat up and me nuh hearing now
them know me nuh scared me now
Guess the POINT is, there IS for me a woman that I want, more than anything else, and I will HAVE her, or destroy everything that stands in my way in the process.
Well, I am no longer pretending otherwise, am I?
NOOO!
Guess the POINT is, there IS for me a woman that I want, more than anything else, and I will HAVE her, or destroy everything that stands in my way in the process.
Well, I am no longer pretending otherwise, am I?
NOOO!
