Which , of course, was when God, after I was already in the train, decided to tell me that I would STILL be coming home with Him, as usual.
Didn't know if that was good or bad, so, I got off at st.james, and well, I will NOT try to claim any responsibility here, but this IS what happened. As I sat on the backrest of this bench, looking out to sea, worried sick, and very, very close to being totally pissed off at everything, not even, for once in my life, feeling the rain on my back. I felt... different... inside, like, something had become ironed out, a kink that I had been aware of that I did not think actually existed, but now only felt aware of now that it was gone, and I was watching these seagulls, noting that there was one that was a different colour from the rest, and then, all of a sudden, I figured I had best get it on, and I was just idly rotating my hands thinking, Bullshit, lets get this on, and like I had pressed pause, EVERYONE of the birds went still, and just stood around as I watched, like frozen.
And as my very incredulous mind registered that, God did another of His contributions:- "Wakurumidza kumedza kutsenga uchada", a line from a song that I just failed to get on YouTube just now, meaning that I had literally decided to swallow before I had fully chewed on the meat.
I started walking.
Into kalk bay.
Like a new born.And first person I meet on the road is that cunt of a rasta, and well, I went "ha ha ha" as I passed him, already projecting the day ahead as I saw it, and getting rather upset already. He must have assumed I was greeting him, because I heard, behind me, 'hi..." as I shook my head and went on. Oh, boy, here we go again. Terms and Conditions time. This will be ... fun... I thought!Met vinnie's pastor and his wife and daughter, and they greeted me like we were friends, just opposite la parada, as they walked towards it and i passed by, and I was like, do I SMELL different?Maybe desperate, maybe, maybe needy, maybe they NOW have my measure? OH, boy, she IS going to do something now, isn't she?
And got to the stall, was not surprised to find it isolated, it WAS after all drizzling, and then, i went to vinnie's and we ended up going to steenberg, thankfully, because his son, maybe imitating my unrully behaviour had, some days before, smashed that tuck-shop's window with his fist, and daddy needed to fix it, so to builders ware house we both went, since the weather was not that kind.And vinnie gave me his daughter's phone, because I had liked one song on it, and I was playing it all day later, and there is a part on it, if I can get it, I can, which would be interesting, it is at the beginning, there, and it directly nullifies the 'not yet..' part
Uhuru, UHURu, UHURU, uhuru!
Anyway, we had to come back, and when we did, the rain was not present, but what was was mike's car directly where we set up our stuff, and I was like, hmmm, maybe NOW I get to move, because the guy would NOT have the balls to be so in my face if he was not sure he had an ace in his sleeve.
I did not see HER as I passed the office, but I saw ms-short-and-dumpy, and well, I know the woman I love, she would NOT take a back seat to this. So, ergo, she WAS there, maybe she was the one being talked to by ms donkey jaws.
We started displaying stuff, and then, vinnie goes, heres your woman, and I straightened up and there she was, in black, not showing my legs, and a bit in front of mike, as she passed, and that was when I went "?!", because all my THEORIES went out the window.Because the woman KNOWS how to hurt me, and she can, and i will admit that the mav. has but ONE vulnerability, and that is what SHE can do to me, and yet, I took one look at her, and I was like, 'ah, WHO the fuck wears the pants in this duo?', meaning her and me, of course, not her and mike, and so, as i did not know whether to flare up or to calm down, God went "ten to one you'll never guess the way the story ends", and so, I waited it out, to see what would happen, as the woman went straight into the building I had said I did not want to see her in. From the house I want made into rubble. because I am jealous. And I stood there knowing that the plot had run away from me, and not even unhappy at it. Although I wondered when the guy she kissed would show up, just to make it all formal and neat.
So, as the rest of them started coming out, I was like, "?!" because, of course, anyone can tell what is going to come next, but well, even the gallery woman was there, right in my face, after the love of my life had walked out of the building-with mike- and some other guy, again making sure that there was distance between her and them, and she made, at first, as if to walk right past me on this side of the road on the way to the harbour, I suppose, and then just changed direction abruptly and crossed the road, and I was watching her, and agreed with vinnie's assesment as i saw her walking past, as I danced to this song, that SHE is running the show, not these other guys, and I was like, I have never seen such a stubborn woman. She makes me feel like sitting down while she takes the steering wheel.
But I watched, and then the gallery woman came out and I was just going, "?!" God, have You lost Your marbles or something? Am I going to stand around and just watch as things happen?
Well, watch I did, and then, later on, shirley came up, said that it was about to rain, and i was not feeling it, so I said, nuh, it wont, and then, well, she came back, and she hovered at the blue bottle entrance, and I was like, hmmm!, and then, slowly, she walked into the bakery and I was like, hmmm, and mike, well, he was sort of hovering there, in the background, and then, as I started getting a chill in me, the guy, he decided to start phonicating, see, and walk right past me, maybe to that building that I wanted to destroy, and I was thinking, well, maybe she has gone behind my back to be with him, and i was mildly surprised to see her walk past from the bakery again, and i was like "?!", and then, mike came back, hovered a bit, sat on the bonnet of his benz, and, well, I was really getting really really cold by then, and well, it started to rain. And kept raining, and I was like, well, I am free, she has made her choice, the mav. can leave, right? Only problem with THAT was that I have eyes.
And the only thing/person I have eyes for is ... her... and unless I am extremely mistaken, the woman was telling me things. Things I heard loud and clear, and so, I have decided to well, think about it.
Just as soon as one small thing sinks in, to everyone's brain.
When vinnie's wife was sick, I used to go and visit her, and then I get told she has gone to work after being an invalid who was bedridden, and so, when tony was busy laughing at me the other time, I was waiting with her parcels as she came back from the first day at work, and as we eventually walked home, she said something that made me go, "If only you really knew the truth!" inwardly, because on THIS rests all the reason why, unfortunately, I am STILL going to kill off everyone off this planet.
She said, ah, well, I know that God loves me, and He will not let me down, but heal me.
And hell, I really, really wished I was dead then, because I KNOW the truth, see.
God is CONSISTENT, and forget jesus, forget the holy spirit, focus on God Himself, Whose first act of judgement OVER the world was to separate from everyone else ONE man, by telling him to build an ark, and then He destroyed the whole earth. And later said, " I will never again destroy the whole earth FOR THE MAN'S SAKE for the imagination of his heart is evil from his youth " NOW i will have to burst your bubble people, because He did not do it for people, but for ONE man that He found righteous before Him, and then later, carrying on with His theme He came to ONE man, abram, and promised him the earth. ONE man. Do you get the drift?
God does NOT love people, He loves the earth for ONE man, and when He came to ME, He did not give me a choice, just made sure that He made me impregnable, and so, what you all did people, today, was futile, because it will not change anything.
Your days are numbered, still.
But, I heard the love of my life, and I have this... offer ... for her. If she will stop trying to be so... bossy... nuh, I like her bossiness, really, I am actually amused that she is so bossy, because I suppose that that is what attracted me to her, to begin with.
Listen, you can not win this, because THIS world is mine, and there is NO way that God is going to let 32 years of work go to waste. As I watched you walk again into that building, He was telling me, over and over again, "I wont let you fall", and so, there is NO way you can do anything that will NOT backfire in your face as you, well, try to get me into your world. I TOLD you, over and over again, that I am the LORD of this earth, and I am GOING to end life, because God is NOT with any of you in this.
So, my deal is this. I am sure that you will find your way round it again and try to be on top, but I suppose that I am not... angry ... at that. BUT my pre-conditions MUST be upheld. You alone, and NO one else. I will not kill any of those other people, yet, because today you showed me truly that you are no one's puppet which is what I worried about before.
YOU are so stubborn. I like it!
Oh, and, of course, that guy you kissed is dead. I can not forgive that. He dies, or I kill him anyway, and still leave.
That is not for negotiation. Those were my lips, and I can not stand that torment of letting anyone else mock me like that.
The rest I will ignore, because i will not label you a prostitute.
BUT I AM the Lord of this Earth, darling, and that is not going to change. Fight it, and you will end up fighting God Himself, because He gets rather more jealous that I do.
You are NOT supposed to STOP me in my tracks, because GOD hates WOMEN. He will NEVER use a woman. How mant times must I SAY that before you get it! READ your Torah and stop making things UP! IT is there, in the original hebrew. Fuck, God IS UNCHANGING, He DOES NOT roll with the punches!
The ONLY reason why you and yours are alive is that God is UNABLE to disappoint ME in MY hope, that I can get you to be MINE!
When will that simple fact sink in?
I will KILL everyone else. Now, or later, same difference.
