And it took a couple of round ears to make me ... see. Ok, so I tend to ... forget that there are things of ...value... to me when my ... pride ... is involved, but this morning,my normally attuned ears and eyes were not working that well. I was more than a little... depresses, and it was with mild surprise, shock, deal-with-it acceptance that i saw the CR-V again parked alongside the la parada entrance,and I figured that she was therefore totally lost to me, and i sank down further, into despair. So when she walked out of the olympia bakery, I did not see her, but I only got to see the back of her head and the round ears on either side of the pony-tailed head as she made her way to the office,and I was lost. Fuck, how can I turn my back on someone like that? Felt I was losing the plot as far as things are concerned, because i knew what was what going in, but now, in the thick of things, I feel I am losing direction. OK so what angers me SHOULD be taken care of, to be avoided- and she disregarded that, meaning she WOULD end up dead unless she paid attention and avoided the fate I have prepared for her male... protectors - but heck,who would I rather have in my life but HER? In this place of intrigue and pretence? Ha?I was very... disheartened... to discover that the girl who gave me 'face' in front of the gallery watchers is part of them. Theymust havebeen laughing themselves silly at my expense right? I am NOT sure that any single one of themdeserves to live any longer, because the silly fools have meddled in my life and affairs for tooo long. It is time I taught them the price of the folly of presumption. Yessss! Needless to say, there will be no jew in my life, and I am keen on neither the scooter chick nor on the blonde that has been walking about all day, nose-in-air. Fuck, I want closure here, especially as far as the ...modern art chick is concerned. I suppose i DO...eh... love the silly woman, but this silliness on her part HAS to end or, regardless of how I feel, or WILL feel about it afterwards, I will kill her. Nobody steps on my toes and gets away with it. As for those i promised death,do I look like I changed my mind? Fuck, not only them but their entire families to the ^n will die as well. And the fools who think that they can change my mind or know better than I do what is what. Fuck, I promise the smart chick and her friend D.E.A.T.H. within a short while. I mean, if i count, something I am beginning to seriously doubt, that i really REALLY want the contemporary art chick, peaches, the swimmer woman and her delicious looking daughter, then I suppose the only missing one WOULD be the Toyota RAV-4woman. In my dreams? Dont know about THAT, because evrything comes to a standstill until i get what i want, and then things, even in 3D, your reality, take the shape I want them to. Found out that if I am unhappy about something, and i have a choice of moving and ignoring that thing, or susoending even things beyond my seeming control till that glitch is dealt with, then, well, the thing first gets dealt with,as everything else waits its turn. Now, the Big Dog wants to have these five women to himself, and then later deal with the rest of the assholes on the planet. So, shall we see just what happens? Or is this, to you, another see-i-told-you-nothing-would-ever-happen post, where i try to...justify... again, my inactivity? Well, wanna bet?
